It’s day 1 of my blog. I’m already over thinking it. I’ve written the first paragraph and deleted it, no less than three times already. This is what plagues me. The perpetual poppycock that yucks up my yum, all the time. Completing a thought, sentence, blog post, project, etc. is typically thwarted by the swirl of messy thoughts that gunks up my progress at every turn.
I’m not sure I was always like this but its become clear since living as a wife and mom, that I don’t function as efficiently, or confidently for that matter, as I’d like. There is room for improvement and more importantly, time for it. I want to do more on my to-do list, because I know I can.
Jeremy, my husband, says I have ADHD. I’m inclined to believe him. I’m unorganized, easily distracted, mindless, surrounded by unfinished projects and new tasks all the time. I’m highly motivated and always working on something, but rarely is it ever completed without some prodding from Jeremy, or whoever is waiting, for it to get done. This is made even more evident by the contrast between he and I.
Jeremy is productive, focused, organized and skilled at everything he does. I’m not just blowing smoke up your old address either. He truly is better than me at everything. Cooking, cleaning, creating, you name it, and he can do it well. Ask him and he’d tell you the same, but not to brag on himself. He’s not much of a bragger, but he is just genuinely annoyed by my lack of focus most of the time, so he would probably point out exactly what I’m trying to explain right now. And you guessed it, he’d do it better.
I don’t know if I have ADHD or not, but I do refer to my normal state as perpetual poppycock because it happens so often, it deserved a name, and the symptoms are very similar. This blog is a great example. Each of the last few years, I’ve started it, only to get distracted a couple days in and forget about it for another year. Spoiler alert…history will probably repeat itself again this year but I’m showing up with high hopes that isn’t the case.
Anywho, in true Ashley fashion, I’m starting a new project, on this new years day, to work towards a new me, and I’m using this blog as my accountability tool. I’m hoping to stay focused and complete a few tasks in 2023 that have long been on my to-do list.
My first task is to make a list of all my to-do’s so I can refer to it every time I get distracted. Wish me luck! I’ll report back as soon as I have done that.